Tuesday, January 6, 2009


When it comes to adoption, Brian and I, have three miracles that have taken place, and they are… Kadee, Braden, and Logan! Of course we have lots more miracles, but the ones I want to share here are all about them.
We have six kids, three I gave birth to, and three we were blessed to adopt.

The main reason I wrote their stories down is because, I want Kadee, Braden, and Logan to be able to hear and see there stories of how they came to be with us.

I also wanted to talk a little bit about the little baby that we didn’t get to keep!
I hope by reading this you will see how truly blessed we are and were through it all.

Heavenly Father has a plan and His plan was for Kadee, Braden, and Logan to stay and be sealed to us for time and all eternity.

It's best to read these stories in order, but you don't have too. Click on the their names on the side of this blog to read the next story, but first sit back, put your feet up and read the story on this page about little adorable Raymundo!


Raymundo’s Story

We didn’t get to keep little Raymundo, but he was with us until he was nine months old. The day we picked him up from the hospital he weighed only 5lbs. He was born three months early and had already had two surgeries before we picked him up.

I remember the call. I was so excited. A baby and he needed me. I wanted him so badly and couldn’t wait to see him.
I heard a whispering in my heart and knew that he wasn’t mine to keep. After I held him though, I didn’t want to believe it. How could I? He was so small and helpless and just perfect.

The social worker asked if we could drive to Mesa and pick him up at the hospital where we would learn how to care for him. I remember the first time I saw him. He was so small. I couldn’t wait to hold him. At the same time I was so afraid that I wouldn’t be able to give him the care he needed. He was put on a bottle, just the day before we picked him up. He had a feeding tube in before that. He struggled learning how to eat. He fought me the whole time I tried to feed him. Then he would throw up and finally feel well enough to eat. The nurses had him on an every four hour four ounce feeding schedule. He was so tiny. How could he go that long in between eating? After we got him home I had to change his eating schedule to an ounce an hour. It seemed to work better for him and he could keep more of it down.

As he got bigger and healthier he became the sweetest happiest baby. He always had the biggest smile for everyone. I knew in my heart that he wouldn’t stay but I couldn’t stand the thought of letting my beautiful baby go. I felt like my heart was breaking in half. I couldn’t think about it. I had to just enjoy the time I did have with him.

CPS decided to have a Family Group Decision Making meeting. This is a meeting where they invite all members of the biological family that they can find. Together they decide what would happen to little Raymundo. After hours and hours of meeting they finally came up with a plan. Raymundo’s great uncle and girlfriend would be taking him to raise. I met them after the meeting and really liked and hated them at the same time. Hated because I felt they would be taking my baby away from me. After all that time, to him, I was his mommy. Over the next month we met with them often so they could take Raymundo and spend time with him and get to know each other. I was so praying that they would change their minds.

The day finally arrived. I didn’t know how I could do it. I couldn’t make my arms give him away. I sat in a chair holding him close and crying and praying at the same time that some how I would be able to make it through this. At that moment I felt literal angels crying for and with me. It began to rain. Not only rain but pour. Sounds weird but, I felt such comfort in the rain that day.

My mom and sister Tami came over to say good bye and be a support for me. When they came to get him he was sleeping. She (his uncle’s girl friend) had to take him from me because I couldn’t let him go. I wanted to run and hide but my sister was right there to grab me and hold me as I thought I could just collapse on the floor. She held me up and offered her support to me. My mom was next to hug onto both of us as we all cried together.

That was truly one of the hardest things I have ever had to do, but over the next few months I felt so close to heaven. I felt the loving support from my Father in heaven in the way of Him sending someone special to help just when I felt I couldn’t go on. I was never alone. Angels were always near.

I don’t know why, but I do know that this is part of God’s plan. His new parents have sent me pictures and have let me see him. I feel so blessed.

10 Things A Birthmother Wants You to Know

The following was written by Patricia Dischler, a courageous woman who placed a baby for adoption in 1985.

"There are 10 things every birthmother thinks about, wishes for, and hopes for when placing their child for adoption. If you are in an open adoption, you may have heard some already, if not, they are important to know. They are:
~I did not place my child because she was “unwanted.” I wanted her so much that I continued a pregnancy filled with unanswered questions.
~I chose adoption because I loved my child. This parental love allowed me to put his needs before my own when making my choice.
~This choice affected more than just me. She has a Grandmother, a Grandfather, and Aunts and Uncles who love her as well, and she will be missed.
~I wish for the day I can look into my child’s eyes and tell him I love him one more time.
~I hope that you will teach my child about her beginnings – about where she was born and who I am.
~I hope you will teach respect to my child by showing respect for me in your discussions.
~I wish I could be there to answer my child’s questions about adoption, but I trust you to answer them truthfully as best you can.
~I will never stop thinking about my child. She will always be a part of who I am.
~I would never try to disrupt my child’s new family with you. I put too much emotion and suffering into making this choice to allow anything to disrupt it – including me.
In my eyes, you will always be my child’s Mom and Dad. And that thought brings me happiness.

My son’s mother wrote to me in her first letter:
“Children are never really ours, they are just entrusted to us for a time by God.”
As birthmothers, we take our short time with our child very seriously, and it affects us the rest of our lives. We place that final kiss on our baby’s forehead and pass them forward to your waiting arms because we know you will be taking it very seriously too."
-------Patricia Dischler-------